The Pull and Deception of Cocaine

2 Peter 2:22   It has happened to them according to the true proverb , “ A DOG RETURNS TO ITS OWN VOMIT ,” and, “A sow , after washing , returns to wallowing in the mire .”

I was married, working in the automobile business and really thought I had gotten my life back on track.  About two years prior I had gone to the first of several rehabs and really desired change, but the pull of drugs was something I could not handle in my own strength.  After months of so-called social drinking and drug use, I had purchased a large amount of cocaine, went out-of-town and cannot really explain why a husband would leave his wife and just start driving….except

That's the pull and deception of cocaine.

I can remember two days into this binge of using cocaine. I was in a hotel warring within myself, wanting to stop, afraid to go home, confused, and quite frankly was concerned about my health.  Trying to reach out the best way I knew how, I called my counselor from rehab and told him my state of mind, what I was doing, and asked him if he could come see me.  He couldn't, and asked if I would flush the drugs down the toilet.  The problem was I had been on the phone with him a while and I was starting to crave more cocaine so I told him that I had flushed the drugs so I could get off of the phone to continue to use.

That's the pull and deception of cocaine.

The next morning I somehow convinced myself to go home even though I still had cocaine and was in my third day with no sleep.  Continuing to use as I was traveling home, deceiving myself that everything was going to be alright, and I had thought of the perfect lies to cover my absence for three days.

That's the pull and deception of cocaine.

Not too far from home I looked in the rear view mirror to see my face and eyes because I wasn't feeling well at all but continued to use.  As I looked at my face I noticed my lips were a shade of blue so now I am really concerned.  It was almost immediately I saw an exit for a hospital with an emergency room so I took the exit.  As I was on the exit I took the bag of cocaine and threw it out the window. You see when I was convinced I might die I was willing to give it up.  I checked into the emergency room and told the doctor exactly what I had been doing and they told me my vital signs were in the danger zone. They kept me for hours, gave me some medicine to get my vital signs back to normal and then released me. What would happen next would be a classic example of how deceptive our heart can be, especially under the influence of cocaine. I went back to the exit where I threw the cocaine out the window, parked my car, and walked up and down the exit searching for it.

That's the pull and deception of cocaine.

I know that this sounds crazy that someone would do this, but the reality is, remorse and guilt is always temporary.  If you treat your spouse wrong, look at pornography, have an anger problem etc., and you find yourself temporarily getting a handle on these issues for them to only return, it’s because the remorse wears off and you do not have the power to sustain the change.  It's God that can truly give you the power to sustain change in your life.

He said in His word ....He who the Son sets free is free indeed!!  Jesus will enable you to walk free of whatever is weighing you down, just ask Him.

Otherwise we will continue to live out the scripture I used in the opening....

2 Peter 2:22   It has happened to them according to the true proverb , “ A DOG RETURNS TO ITS OWN VOMIT ,” and, “A sow , after washing , returns to wallowing in the mire .”

No matter how bad we feel about something we have done if we don't give it to Jesus it probably will return.